so after 4 months in india i have been asked for money or to buy something a fair amount of times. i think what i dislike the most about my experience in india is i feel like i can not stand still on the street for very long without being asked for something or to buy something. it doesn’t happen all the time but often enough that i feel like it is easier to see india “on the move” than standing in one place.
i do think it is tragic that anyone has to go about living their life that way but it still doesn’t sit well with me when people ask me for money. if i see someone who is obviously in need and i can give them something without them asking a feel a lot better about it than if someone approaches me. i usually don’t give money because in some situations it is not the best thing to do…i was given good advice to carry candy to give to kids so they can at least have something nice that they may not get often, or i have bought food for people. i think part of the thought in me is “why should i give you something just because you ask for it? did you earn it / deserve it?” do i deserve the love and salvation that God has for me? No. did i deserve to be born into a situation where i didn’t have to beg for my food? i had nothing to do with it. freely i was given, freely i should give. this all makes sense but my heart is still in a place where when people ask for money it rubs me in a unpleasant way. thats where i’m at for better or worse.
i think when charities ask for money it is that same part of me that is rubbed. in some ways missionaries/charities become beggars. i think mother theresa knew this when she took a vow of poverty and decided to live like the people she was serving. so maybe its not a bad thing. some work needs to have outside help while i think some work could be done while earning ones own bread. similar to how if someone asks me or if i just see the need on my own depends on how it will rub me. with jeevan jyoti i have a relationship there and have gotten to know the situation without being asked for money, so i have become inclined to want to help. opposed to if someone shows up on a sunday morning and asks for help i am less likely to be excited about giving. ….. i don’t know how else they could solicit support or think it is wrong to solicit support….i’m just saying how it strikes me.
